The Dangers of Homeschooling

I know we are supposed to be homeschool advocates, but I have just run into several dangers of being a homeschool parent.  These are not little pitfalls, but major death defying dangers.  I am scared to write this as I know some left leaning anti homeschooler will use this as proof that we are radicals.

Several days ago I came home.  I was tired and slightly discombobulated.  I was running low on blood sugar from not eating the entire day at work.  I had a few minutes to spare between appointments so I wanted to eat a very quick bite and be off.

I looked in the fridge (where the chicken mummies nearly fell on my head when I opened the door) and found a rare treat.  Bagels.  Oh what a delight!  Bagels are wonderful.  I was so excited to have a bagel.  Oh, and look at that on the counter.  Could that be cream cheese?

I was so excited to have a bagel with cream cheese that I hardly noticed it was a little hard to spread.  Maybe it was accidentally put in the freezer.  No problem, I will just put it in the microwave and warm the whole thing up together. 

30 seconds had passed and the cream cheese melted into the bagel.  I could hardly wait to eat this wonderful little morsel.  Hope sprang into my body, and just the smell of warm bagel was revitalizing my energy.  I took a bite.  Mmmmmm, mmmmm, ummm...

Something was a little out of the ordinary on that bite.  No matter, all will be right with the next bite.  Slowly I closed my eyes and opened my mouth to taste that wonderful cream cheese, but...  Now it was certain.  Something was definitely not right here.  Maybe it was the cream cheese.  Maybe it had been sitting a little too long on the counter.  I did notice it was a little hard to spread.  Well, I was hungry and there was no point in wasting a bagel, even if it did taste a little weird.

I went on to nearly the end of the bagel wondering where I had tasted that wierd taste before.  I couldn't put my finger on it.  Suddenly, the wife and kids burst through the front door. 

"What are you eating," my wife asked. 
"A bagel and cream cheese," said I.  "Would you like one?"
"Sure" was the unanimous reply.

We started to eat bagels together and I noticed the kids avoided the cream cheese on the counter and instead went for some other cream cheese in the fridge.  Fortunately for them, the chicken mummies had been moved so they wouldn't fall on their heads.  I asked them why they didn't finish the cream cheese on the counter.  "Dad, that isn't cream cheese.  It's a bar of soap!"