Sixteen Years

Well, today Andrea and I have officially been married sixteen years.  To some, this would seem like a miracle.  The two of us are very different in many ways.  She is quiet, beautiful, very hard working, very organized, smart, and self sufficient.  I, on the other hand and loud, wild, free wheeling, quick witted and needy.  Andrea could be fine on a deserted island with just a box of books.  She would be able to travel back in time to the 1800’s and be totally comfortable with the lack of technology.  She didn’t need to get married.  She could have been totally happy in life without a man.

Me, well, lets just say I am glad I live today.  I wish I could have been in an area with more snow in the winter so I could do more snowmobiling.  I would like to have jumped a number of things that I didn’t get a chance to before I sold my sled.  If I had my way I would race rally cars, motocross, mountain bikes, and stadium trucks.  I would have more time for XBOX and bass guitar.  I would find a way to keep thin in a bottle.  I would center my house around the giant screen video machine.  I would have a dvd camcorder so I could capture each extreme thing.  I would need friends and someone to be there for me all the time, especially to take care of my boo boo’s.

Well, this is why some would think this past sixteen years is a miracle.  But, you see, God is into doing things His way.  Let’s go back to when we met.  It was back in September of 1988.  I was walking along at Wayne State, arguing with God.   I had no idea why I was there.  I had no real friends and could not understand the fast pace of college life.  I couldn’t get on the same page as anyone.  As I walked along I was telling God all this stuff.  It was a rough time and I was letting God know it.  I was asking Him for answers to all the riddles in my life at the time.  I wasn’t getting any answers until I walked into the Music Center at WSU.  At that point I was almost reconciled to an attitude of “are you done” from Father, but He had a little surprise for me.  As I met up with some of the people I knew I was introduced to Andrea.  She looked great, and it would have been nice to know her, but here is what happened.  When I saw her I heard the voice of Father telling me, “Son, she is why you are here.”  We were engaged in July of 1989, ten months later.

Marriage is not what I expected it to be.  Obviously, as a young man, I now had a wife beside me and there were a lot of adjustments to make.  I don’t remember it that way, though.  I remember that she made it easy in a lot of ways.  Marriage was actually natural for us.  Even though we are different, it just seemed to work.  Yes, there were some areas that were a clash but that was nothing to the things I think we found.  In our marriage things that should have been impossible just flowed.  I remember the birth of our first son.  Everyone around me was panicking because I didn’t even know which end of the baby was up.  I am sure people thought I was going to accidentally kill the poor child by diaper suffocation.  Well, he is thirteen today and we have three more to boot. 

How can marriage be so easy when two people are so different?  I’ll tell you.  I don’t know.  Ok, I do know.  I just wanted to quote Reptevia from The Fiddler on the Roof.  God.  That is the answer.  Now, there are things that He built in Andrea that make it easy.  I will take a few minutes to tell you about my wife and why marriage is easy.

1. She loves me.


2. She talks to me.


3. She listens to me.


4. She cares about what I care about.


5. She seeks Father.


6. She prays for me.


7. She supports me.


8. She is good at things that I am not good at.


9. She is rational.


10. She is HOT!


11. She is funny


12. She allows both of us to grow and doesn’t force me to be where she is.


13. She is a rock.


14. She can kiss me and I see stars.


15. She encourages me.


16. She helps me see things in a different light or consider new things.

Those are just some of the things.  I could go on and on.  I will tell you that I do have one regret about marrying Andrea, though.  My one regret is that we got engaged in 1989 and got married in 1991.  If I had it to do over again I would have gotten married in 1989.  I know, men, you will all read this blog and get jealous.  Many men are.  I know, women, you will read this blog and feel inadequate.  Many women do.  BUT.  I firmly believe that all of the qualities that God knows you need are found in your spouse just as they are in mine.

Well, with that said, I didn’t go into all the mushy details of how much I love Andrea, but I do.  Andrea, I love you and I am so glad you married me.  You could have done anything in life you wanted to.  You are so capable of doing anything, but you chose to be my wife.  I want you to know how much I appreciate that choice.  Thank you for the life you have so willingly shared with me these years.

With all my love,

 

Your Robert