Notes From Becoming a Genuine Father

Steve Walden wrote a reply to my earlier post Fathers and Families.  Here is his reply.

I read this reply and took a deeper look at things.  Being a son of a good, fire fighter dad made quality family time tough.  It is funny, I can draw some parallels between his job and his fathering style.  I am not finding fault with him in any way.  I want to make sure that is known.  I am learning from where I am plain and simple.

I look at how I was raised, and was raised with a lot of freedom, and a lot of discipline.  I was not raised with a lot of communication.  Communication was used as a tool to put out fires.  It was sprayed as needed over the parts needing the most attention.  There was always a sense of urgency and tension when it was used (as in fighting a fire).  It was also not used more than needed.  This was in everything from correctiona nd discipline to joking around. 

I know there is freedom from generational sin.  I have seen that.  I know there is also a way to learn to better communicate.  You wrote of your fathers' promise never to fall into some things, and I have been similar in my parenting (in making promises that I would change certain things).  I am very involved with my kids.  I love them and do spend a lot of time with them.  I talk a lot with them and do listen to them.  That being said, I feel like I miss a lot in the area of developing their Godly character and discipline, and "parental" issues.

As I wrote in my response to Scott Somerville, I am in need of spending time with my "DAD" more.  In this area, I relate to my children how I was related to on earth.  I see the need to create a better devotional time for this purpose.  It is funny and embarrassing that I can be a better father to my youth ministry in the area of correction than I can in the home.  This, as it is unfolding, seems to be because my focus is evangellizing and reaching my youth in the 8Mile area.